The Currency
by Zarius
Summary: Snuggles has reservations about sharing life stories in a comedy club, but gets some spirited advise from Penfold's favourite chick.


**DANGER MOUSE:**

**THE CURRENCY**

**WRITTEN BY ZARIUS**

* * *

In spite of his best efforts, the bow tie just wouldn't allow Snuggles to adjust it.

Snuggles sighed, he was hopeless at this.

Utterly hopeless.

He had a whole army of soft toys at his beck and call once. That was the _easiest_ thing to command, this was by certainly the hardest thing to sell.

An appearance. A _performance_.

It was a simple task, but a complicated one all the same.

All he had do was get them to laugh.

Maybe a few would, but what about the rest.

Eighty or so people crammed in a room, some high on coffee lattes and primed to heckle

One wrong joke and he'd become the laughing stock.

Maybe if he just performed the very calamitous routine he was engaged in now, trying to fix his bow tie, trying to give himself some form of decent presentation, and failing at it. Everyone loved a good hard luck story, someone overwhelmed by the odds but making a good show of it altogether.

A bit of physical mishap would distract, it would delight. It would be an easy reaction to command.

But he was here for the challenge, he wasn't here to take it easy, he wanted to command the stage with the stories he could spin, stories based in truth, the far too telling hardships of a single guardian looking after the most dangerous girl in the world. Oh it would hurt to laugh.

"A minute to curtain Snuggles" said the floor manager on the outside of Snuggles' door.

Snuggles looked at his dishevelled appearance in the mirror one last time, smacked the glass with his paw and cracking it so now the reflection was more fun house imagery, then walked out of the dressing room and towards what the pro wrestling fan in him labelled the gorilla position

Emerging from the stage was a familiar face, a pint-sized hamster wearing a spot of striped pyjamas, and a long giraffe overly long giraffe head towering over the hole reserved in the middle for his regular face. He was accompanied by a much taller female chicken in casual attire, torn jeans, white t-shirt, slightly looser hair than she was known for, and a beanie hat.

Snuggles could hear a chorus of boos coming from the crowd, which had visibly hurt the hamster.

"The sheer nerve of them, don't they know nerd culture is all that's happening right now?" said Penfold as he walked back to his dressing room

"Not everyone watches Giraffe Warriors, especially people in their 30s" said Squawkencluck.

"They have all the episodes on the I-Player, they can stream along any time to follow the jokes I was telling"

"They're here to unplug Penfold, unwind, get away from devices and what they can't get amusement of from the regular television, besides, you can't command them to watch one thing and focus on another" Squawk explained.

"Oh is that so? Well maybe I should focus less on saving their world with the Chief and concentrate more on the culture I aim to entertain, then maybe they'll have time for me" Penfold said.

"Now you're being silly"

"I like silly"

"Me too" Squawk replied, kissing him on the cheek.

The two strolled past Snuggles; Squawk froze and paced back just to make absolutely sure she knew it was him.

"What on Earth are you doing here?" she said.

"None of your ear wax" Snuggles said.

"You've got a mic in your hand, are you going to go out there? You? What could you possibly have to say?"

"Life, that's what all comedy's about isn't it?"

"Life with Dawn I presume" said Penfold.

"Where is she anyway?" Squawk asked.

"I didn't tell her I was here" Snuggles revealed.

"Why not?"

"She'd think I was making fun of her, and if she saw how tough this crowd was with you and your hamster boyfriend, she'd wouldn't just sit there and take it if she thought for a moment they were making fun of me"

"Just shows, as dangerous as she is, that she's a true friend who'd stand in your corner and put everybody else in their place. Somehow I doubt she'd take too much offence to you talking about her in this fashion, she might even acquire the ability to laugh at herself and the situations she puts you and her through. We've seen how she came to regret your brief falling out and how she reached out to you in understanding, so she's fully capable of realizing when she goes too far. I think, so long as you don't go through every detail and not make fun of _why_ she gives you a hard time, simply _how_, she can reach out to you and find a means of conveying her needs a bit more fairly"

Snuggles smiled, he didn't expect such spirited advice to come from an enemy of his surrogate daughter, but then, maybe because this was the same person who had tried to give Dawn a bit of a play date in the past, even with an ulterior motive at the time, he felt a bit more secure around her than he did the witless hamster ally of his young charge's occasional foe and interest.

"Oh, and just so you know, this fellow happens to be my best friend, not my boyfriend" Squawk added, referring to Penfold.

"Yeah, she's also my sponsor" Penfold said.

"Sponsor? Nice to have some friends with benefits" Snuggles remarked.

The sound of laughter from Squawk at this brought some measure of delight to Snuggles.

"You liked that one?" he said.

"Oh yes, right off the cuff, it's impressive, being able to think on your feet like that, could come in handy with hecklers" she said.

"Yeah, it's an ability I wish I had" Penfold replied.

"Minutes up sir, we're introducing you now" said the floor manager.

Squawk noticed Snuggles' crooked bow tie.

"Just one thing Snuggles" said Squawk, taking the time to adjust it properly.

"Thanks" said Snuggles, patting Squawk on the head with his felt paw.

As Penfold and Squawk left the club, they discussed the possible ramifications of Snuggles 'routine

"I hope you're right about Dawn Professor. Someone's bound to be recording that performance, Dawn could go to the correctional classes the next day and just be pestered by all the other delinquents, it could make her worse to deal with" Penfold cautioned.

"Dawn has the power to put all of them in their place too, if she gets mad at them, it might even scare them straight, giving us less repeat offenders to worry about. She could take out all her frustrations out on them and spend time at home sorting things out with Snuggles"

"That's a lot of projection Professor, and it requires a lot of faith"

"Earnest, putting my money where my mouth is was very much the reason you wound up on stage. I like to take gambles every now and then"

"Yeah, but you lost this time out, nobody appreciated my jokes"

"Did you learn anything?" Squawk said.

"Yes, I learned not everyone has to like or learn about the same things I do"

"As long as you learn something, the experience is well worth the currency" Squawk replied, and clutched Penfold's hand tightly as they crossed the street and headed back home.


End file.
